Menopause or Losing Your Mind?

Welcome to Heal Talk Tuesdays with Liza, where transformation begins as we evoke, embrace, and evolve.

Is it menopause, or are you losing your mind? See, today’s conversation is all about hormones, emotions, and your subconscious mind. What if there’s another way to see things?

Did you know that during menopause, a woman can begin to feel like a stranger in her own body? One minute we’re confident, and the next we’re anxious, irritable, exhausted, or crying for absolutely no good reason. Actually, it’s happened to me so many times. We walk into a room and we go, “Why am I here?” Have you experienced that? Because we look in the mirror sometimes, and we wonder, where did I go?

It’s not a joke. A few weeks ago, it happened to me. I was putting my hair together, and I walked into the kitchen because there was a specific thing I had to pick up from the kitchen. I walked into the kitchen, brushing my hair, and I’m like, “Why am I here?”

So, I’m Liza Boubari, your expert hypnotherapist. I’ve been working as a clinical hypnotherapist in stress management for 29 years, especially helping women understand the connection between the mind, the emotions, and our bodies.

So here’s something fascinating. During perimenopause and menopause, fluctuating and declining estrogen levels can affect the brain systems involved in mood, sleep, sleep deprivation, a whole lack of sleep, and even temperature regulation. One minute we’re cold, one minute we’re hot, and another minute we need to fan ourselves with just about anything because we’re boiling, even in the middle of winter. That’s why women experience what we call brain fog. We go through anxiety and interrupted sleep. Even our libido shuts down. And yes, hot flashes and emotional changes. We can cry, we can laugh, at just about anything.

I remember years ago, before they labeled or understood what all these menopausal effects are, they would say, “She’s gone cuckoo again. It’s that time of the month again.” Actually, even from the time we started our menstrual cycles, it was, “Oh, there goes the emotion. It’s that time of the month.” So in a way, we as women have always been labeled: “It’s her emotions.” Not understanding that there is a whole science and chemistry. Everything happens in our body, and that is why we respond like that, why we react like that. It’s not because we want to, believe it or not.

Here’s a mind shift. Menopause is a biological transition. It’s not the end of our identity. That’s it. It’s not that we can’t control it; there are many ways to control it. And this is where hypnosis becomes interesting.

Research suggests that clinical hypnosis can help someone reduce hot flashes, improve sleep, and definitely improve menopausal quality of life. And how do we do that? I use self-hypnosis not only for my own blood pressure, but even for regulating hot flashes. I may feel it coming, and I feel the heat rising, or I used to, let’s put it that way. And at that very moment, it takes me three minutes to regulate it, because I have learned how to manage my body, command my body, or even have a communication with my body and my nervous system. Why? Because our brains influence how we experience and respond to physical sensations, stress, and discomfort.

Again, I want you to get this. It is our brain that can influence how we experience all these hot flashes and the things that we feel. Because when we feel it in our body, it’s like a switch. And instead of a switch that’s on or off, just imagine one of those switches where you turn the knob for the light to go higher or dim the light. It’s called a dimmer. What if I were to say I can help you place a dimmer, the same way we do in pain management? A dimmer that lowers the pain level lower, and lower, and lower. We do the same thing internally for our menopausal response.

Because hypnosis is nothing but focused attention, guided imagery, and therapeutic suggestions. Not only given by me as a clinical hypnotherapist; I also teach you to give the same suggestions to yourself, to your body, and your nervous system regulates according to the messages you give. So, it doesn’t replace hormones or medical care. It offers another evidence-based tool for managing certain symptoms.

And ladies, let me ask you this. How many times have you said, “I just want to feel like myself again”? How many times? We do that all the time. We look in the mirror and we go, “I’m sick and tired of this.” Or you may be sitting at a gathering, you’re looking gorgeous, and then suddenly you’re sweating. Sweat all over, at the back of your neck, your hair; your hairline is constantly sweating right here. Or you see sweat literally drip, even here. Now, that creates self-consciousness. It creates almost a feeling of shame to be in a place like that, or even to wear a beautiful evening gown.

And what if this chapter about your body is not about getting old, or getting the old you back, but about something more beautiful: embracing who we are? At age 11 or 12, we are told that our menstrual cycle is about to start. And if we had an amazing start, we had our mom sit us down and say, “This is the becoming of a woman.” And even that is celebrated. Some cultures, some religions, some traditions celebrate it: the quinceañera when a girl turns 15, the sweet sixteen, or when a young man enters manhood. These celebrations happen. It’s a huge thing. And for some of us, Mom just said, “You know what? It’s going to happen. Don’t worry about it. If it happens, just let me know, and you’ll get over it.”

And the same thing is true about menopause. Sometimes we know it’s coming. Sometimes we don’t even know it’s happening in our body. And the body may feel foreign. Yes, foreign. We gain weight. We lose weight. We gain a lot of weight. We start eating for no reason. We’re hungry for no reason. We just want to stuff our face for no good reason. And yet, there is a good reason.

If you’re experiencing all this, menopausal reactions, hot flashes, even anxiety, your mood going up and down, feeling sleepless… You know, I once had a client who said, “Absolutely, I have no desire for intimacy. My husband feels left out, and I just don’t feel it. There is nothing.” It’s not your fault. And there are so many things we can do. I even work with a naturopathic doctor, so that together we can work on this emotionally, physically, medically, everything in a natural way, to help guide you to feel more whole again. For that emotional overwhelm, there are ways to support you and to build a stronger mind-body connection.

You know the dimmer that I talked about? If I can help someone lower the dimmer so they can manage pain, we can manage this. You can be more confident. You can manage your body and realize that when you feel the hot flashes coming, there’s that internal regulation. We can dim that. So, by all means, contact me.

Self-conscious, sleepless nights, feeling overwhelmed, exhausted, unappreciated, undervalued: that is not the way to live. And believe it or not, through hypnosis, you gain more confidence. You sleep better and awaken more refreshed, with a deep, profound sleep, so that even if it is five hours, you awaken knowing, “I feel rested.” And you know, when you feel rested, you can manage things so much better. When you come to understand how to regulate your internal bodily functions, and your body responds to what you command, it’s amazing to feel more in control. Yes, exercise helps; healthy eating helps. And realize that there is so much that is also in your control.

So, follow me for more conversations. If this makes a difference, by all means, share it, like it, and let me know. As a women’s expert in mind-body wellness, you know, there is a book that says we are connected: Louise Hay, Heal Your Body. Heal your body, and you heal yourself. That’s emotional. When I talk about emotional eating, not understanding why you’re eating, it’s because you’re stuffing something down internally, stuffing it so that you don’t have to deal with it. Exactly.

I’m Liza Boubari. We utilize the Boubari 3E Method, which is evoking what was, embracing what is, the here and now, so that you can evolve to what it is that you want, your desired goal. And you know why? Because you matter.

You can always find more. Actually, I have an audio recording specifically for menopause in the shop on HealWithin.com. I’ve got books with many different modalities: do-it-yourself hypnotic techniques and tools. And if you want to experience hypnosis and hypnotherapy and do it much faster, by all means, I’m here for you. Until next week, God bless you, and may the universal light surround you always. See you then.

And this is Liza Boubari, your expert hypnotherapist. If this message resonated with you, let’s connect. You’re not alone.